Friggity Fridizzle

Well I have been meaning to post all week. But one of my English deadlines for a thesis popped up and it was STRESSVILLE! I did get a research assignment done for Rock History though, I loved it! I did a paper about the plane crash that Killed Buddy Holly, The Big Boopper, and Ritchie Valens. I was fascinated by how little articles I found. I specifically focused on the song "American Pie" by Don McLean and how the day of the crash is now known as "The Day The Music Died". sad sad.
anywho..

Unable to find a thesis for a paper I'm supposed to be writing.
This artist block that has been lingering for 2 and a half years is really starting to get old.
I am starting to believe that in order to write shit that people will like and get into I have to be drug fed and sleep deprived, maybe even depressed and co-dependent. Hell maybe even homeless.
I've been reading over stuff that I was writing when I was 16 and it's SO raw and honest. I will post one that is embarrassing but SO GOOD. I used to love just letting go and writing about what-the-hell-ever came out of the tips of my fingers as I typed.. reading it after ward it was like not even knowing what to expect. So I keep flipping through these pages of my past to find some inspiration...

...Nada.

/frustration. (For now)

I need help on my math; I'm not going to ask my mom, she really annoys me. Whether it's because I have too much pride to ask for HER help, or I just really have no patients to talk math with her... yeah that's the one, I throw up a little when I think about asking her for math help. I showed her my research paper about the plane crash just because I thought it was cool, and she's all, "yea, let me just wait to see this on the computer so we can start on a 2nd draft." and I immediately went off the deep end and started getting defensive.
"How dare you, mom, I was just showing you because I thought you might be interested in what it was I have to say, not to scrutinize my verbiage."

Ugh. I will take criticism from ANYONE, and love it, but not from her. I just CAN'T, my face turns red, my head splits and aches and I clench my fists into balls of fury. Why? No idea. I have such a short fuse with her. I love her, but when it comes down to it... I can't stand her 'momming' approach. She has good help to offer me I'm sure, but I just get really infuriated, and FAST.
I want to do it all headache free. I do it all at school because the apartment is hardly big enough for me to turn around in, I don’t have a room and space to think and be organized. I wish I could afford to live in a place with Bekah, She makes me so happy. <3 I’m going to tough this all out, and take advantage of living in a place for free rent. Try to keep a firm hold on my sanity (and GPA).

So anyways, I just ranted. My head is stuffed.

I darted outta school today, I have been waiting all week for Friday. I bussed my way up to Bekah Boo. I helped her make a clown suite.. Well ok I just sewed beanie baby heads on for big buttons and watched TV while she did it.. it turned out amazing! and now we are gonna go to the KUBE93 haunted house. SO STOKED! ahh

I worked allot this week! This is a good thing on account that I feel very broke after having to donate 400 bux to my moms over drafted bank account :( well when she pays me back I may just have enough to get a car, or if I wait 3 more months I might even be able to get Julie's VW that she wants me to have<3
SOOO I have been blasting Sublime alot more than normal lately. and I have decided that it must be done.. I'm getting the Sublime Sun tattoo'd on me. i cant decide between my other hip..(Brandon Boyds art is on my left) or my backshoulderarea.

LOOOVE Sublime.
:)
OH I also plan to get the Floyd Flowers too. FORNICATION BABY!

So It's been a stressful week, and I'm all ready to get all Scared at a haunted house! woohoo!

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