To unpathed waters, undreamed shores

Well my bus adventure was very chill. I got from Tacoma to Bothell in one painless piece. I hiked about 4 miles in all in the rain and wind, the bus driver forgot where to turn, and that threw me way off course. So when I made it to Bekah’s at around seven I was set on spending the night. 
The next morning (this morning) I slept in rather than waking up at the ass crack of dawn, and busing to school, instead I skipped two whole classes and got a ride to South Center with Bekah. She made me eggs before we left, which I made intp a peanut butter-egg and cheese sandwich. She was disgusted with me… I don’t see why, I make friggin’ TASTY sydwitches!
Well here I am, finally at school, just a little late. Some boy tapped me on the shoulder and I was startled, because I don’t know A SOUL on this campus. I thought it would be the mean library security guy telling me to put my bottle of water away, or to stop texting, like he usually does. But it was a dude that I used to run into at raves back in the day. I forgot his name but he know mine, and that made me feel inadequate, I wish I could just be like, “yeah, hi I remember you but not enough to remember your name…” He always messages me on MySpace too, but that doesn’t help because he’s name on there is “GET DRUNK” he was telling me about how he’s in treatment… though he wreaked of alcohol.
Anyway, speaking of reek…Someone in my general vicinity really smells bad, like bad poop breath and Indian food… UGH. Yuck yuck.

So Bekah and I had a really optimistic car ride from Bothell to south center! We spoke of goals and happiness, reassuring each other that we are capable of doing anything that we put our minds to. I want to get a camera (recording kind…) so I can start making movies. I was watching one at Jeff’s the other night, and I REALLY want to tape stuff I experience and make it into a rad music video. I want to do SO much! Much more than I ever remember wanting to do. I will follow Kale’s “possibilities” board Idea and make a collaborative file of photos and aspirations! Filled with words like “YES” and “because I CAN” and “Health” and “WEALTH” things of that sort.

I better go catch up on my math home work now.

OH, and that picture post I've been talking about, I WILL do it tonight. Or I will turn into a pile of poo. mom's been kicking me off the comp lately..to do her e-mails. I have determination.

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Fallen Season.

It's hard to beleive it's almost HALLOWEEN!
Last night Monica, Talia and I went over to Jeff's with Suzye and Randy and Ashley. I had SO much fun with all of them! I miss my friends very, very much. We played russian Ruellette and Kinds cup, till Suzye fed it to the carpet and all the smokers stepped out for a break. It was refreshing. I love them all. Now I'm here at monicas, About to go on another long bus adventure back to Bekahs, Because My phone is dead and I left my charger at her house. I am pretty excited though, to be honest. I'm glad I get to go see her once more before monday plagues me with a new week of.. whatever. lol.
I have a beautiful kitten on my lap righ tnow, One of Bones's Kittens that monica got, adn calls him Maxwell. So presious.. when he's not being a little hell child. My lap is very hot.
My book is getting rediculous!! Im stoked for the bus ride (if I dont fall asleep) I will be reading and gasping.. and drooling.
SUzye, you should send me those hawt sexy pics. xoxox
ok. thats my quickie update - maybe more later when i get home.

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Grumble grumble.

My stomach has been rumble/grumbling for the past two days. It's annoying.
Guess what?! I splurged yesterday and got a one hour massage, and it was amazing! I needed it SO bad. Being so off my rocker lately. I then went to work at the bar and EVERY ONE WAS NICE TO ME! It was very slow because of the VP debates I assume so i got to get outta there early, and Mom was on the computer when i got home (i was going to do a picture post) so I just west strait to bed. I finished Eclipse last night so i had no reason to stay up until my eyes wouldn't stay open, but I was out pretty damn fast and dreamed about weird things that I don't remember now. I remember one; I woke up and looked at my phone and it was 8:30am and I was a bout to freak out and jump out of bed (late for class) but then I just put my phone down and went back to sleep until my alarm work me up. Remembering my dream I looked at the clock and was relieved to find that It was 6:00am plenty of time to get ready and take the bus and get to class on time.
Every morning someone gets on the bus a wreaks of tuna fish. It's disgusting.
I was more observant this morning because I didn't have my face glued to my book (I'm getting the last one from Bekah today!)
Bekah and I are hanging out today!!
And then I'm going to see Monica in Tacoma!!

YAY I have weekends again!! I'm so glad I quit Luna Park. I NEED this weekend!

I would really like to make a picture post.. But i don't know if I can from school.. Cuz.. they're not in the files.
oh well it will happen soon enough.
well I have to pee so bad, I'm pretty distracted I just wanted to keep up with my blogging.

Ciao

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A breath of fresh air!

I slept so soundly last night, I woke up with just enough time to eat my oats and skip out the door to catch the bus. I wasn't too cold and I am to the very last pages in the book (I'm pacing myself to make it last longer because I have to wait till Friday to get the next one). I was very observant (I just had the hardest time trying to remember what that word was...weird) on the bus this morning, my second full week of fall quarter, and I notice the same people get on every morning, I’ve also noticed three other people so far (not counting me) reading the twilight series (it’s spreading). I watched the Brad Pitt movie, ‘Seven Years in Tibet’, last night. And I loved it. Acting is fascinating! I’m strongly considering taking up theatre as an elective here at school. Just for a taste.

In my History of Rock and Roll class we watched a movie on racism in the south in the 1950’s. The video showed the open casket funeral of Emmitt Till (a 14 year old boy who was beaten beyond recognition and then shot in the head for saying “bye baby” to a white woman in a corner market before integration in 1955 Mississippi-her brother-in law and husband where guilty...but of course they weren’t charged with the murder) I fought to hold back tears. I’m so sensitive. I don’t know if it’s just lately, or if this is just how I am.

I haven’t been single in a while, and I think that, that might have something to do with my insecurity and anxiousness lately. It’s great. I have had a chance to think about me, spend time meditating on what I want and not focusing on making someone else happy to distract myself from that. I’m coming around to myself, and finding focus on what’s important to me, and people who are important to me. All that pish posh at Luna Park, with people testing and trying me, doesn’t matter and I know I shouldn’t let them (or what they might think about me) get to me. Because they really don’t give a shit about me, and why should I care? *smile*

I’m sitting in the Library/computer lab here at school. And there are a bunch of loud boys (G’s..?) across the table, talking about MySpace, and saying shit a lot, I happened to check my MySpace mail roughly 3 minutes later, and there was a message that said “what it do shawtayy hi hi hi..halla at yuh boy what up dreads” and I looked up and one of the boys waved at me, grinning from ear to ear. He had a long heavy-looking silver chain with some symbol I didn’t recognize, huge diamond squares on each earlobe, a baggy white tee and a doo rag. I love White Center. There must be a lot of alcoholics that go to school here, because the last two days here in the library I have caught random whiffs of people who sit next-to or across from me and it’s almost like a wasted man breathing 3 inches from my face at the bar. Hmm

Well I’m eager to go home and make a second post. It will be a photo post because Suzye just posted some photos from EmergeNsee! I love looking at photos, so I will post some for you all to enjoy, where ever you all are in the world!

XOXO

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Why oh why?

I fell asleep at about 12:30am after reading 3 chapter of Eclipse and half a chapter from my History or Rock & Roll text. But this morning I woke up at 3am, went pee, and all these self-conscious thoughts, worries and stresses flooded my brain. I was thinking about the people at Luna Park, how I had accidentally opened my big mouth and shit-talked one of the women there (I'm sure by now it's gotten back to her) She deserved it, but I never want to be the one that is gossiping, and venting aimlessly to people who I don't know or care about. So I digress, from this day on I will not speak of negative things to anyone, I will try my best to be peaceful and pleasant no matter how I really feel. Some people are just so good a blending in and not letting what's bothering them effect their overall mood. It will take some effort, but I need to try to not be so sensitive.

I left my camera in the girls car that drove me home the other night, I am pretty sure. And I really want it back. but P.j. wont respond to any of my calls or texts. LAME. I have to go to Luna today after school sometime anyhow and pick up my 2nd to last paycheck. I shudder when I think about all the bad energy there. I don't know why I'm such an emotional mess right now, I can't believe I couldn't fall back asleep due to worrying what people think about me. Stop being so sensitive Sydney!

I'm going to stop freaking out now :)


Bekah and I are going for Sushi and a movie on Friday! I can't wait. we're going to see Nick and Norah's' Infinite Playlist! It's got the cute boy from Juno (Michael Cera).







I think by then I'll have finished the 3rd book in the Twilight Saga, Eclipse and be able to move on the the 4th, Breaking Dawn! I love that I am so easily amused when it comes to love stories. I wish I could fall asleep and just dream myself into the book. I want to be bella, her life is so exciting. There's really never a dull moment, She's in love with a vampire, that is begging her to marry him so he can change her into a vampire and they live happily ever after for all eternity as immortals. AND have a young Werewolf in love with you, AND be hunted by a vengeful vampire who's mate was murdered by her hunky vampire lover. ah god. I'm loving geeking out to this. I am excited for the movie to come out next month. I hope its not disappointing, as movies tend to be after reading the book in all its glory. I want to get a big ol clan together who loves twilight, like Bekah and Suzye and Bekahs lil sis Clara, My lil sis Kyndall, Toni from my work.. all my buddies that are in just as deep as I am and dress up and go to the midnight showing of the movie when it comes out! :) Ahh. I am starving for some romance. Maybe I just need to suck it up and become an actress so I can live out these fantasies.

Now I'm all floaty.

Good day

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Hello Monday!

So last night was my last shift at Luna Park Café! It was horrid at the beginning, but toward the end, it was quite possibly the best time I’ve had under that roof! When I first got there it was packed and there was a posse of Luna employees (including managers) sitting along the bar having drinks after their morning shift, one of them being Heather Hess, the manager of Luna Park. Now, I don’t smoke like everyone else at Luna Park does, so I don’t take frequent 5 minute breaks, instead I make myself a fruit smoothie and sip it in between busing tables and seating new customers. Heather saw me take one of my drinks of the delicious smoothie and locked eyes with me. She marches over and, very sarcastically, says to me, “Can you maybe do your job instead of drinking a smoothie, Thanks! Autumn is over there hostess-ing, and she is very unhappy about it!” I roll my eyes at her frosty request, It’s my last day and she’s gotta be a bitch to me, Figures! So I start storming around there, sour attitude in check, not making eye contact with anyone, busting ass and getting shit done, like I always do, but somehow always gets over-looked by the ass hole managers. AHHH! So I started calming down, Autumn came over and told me not to listen to Heather, that she’s a bitch and we all know it. So then me, being so sensitive and fragile, started unloading what Heather had said, how I feel and started crying. Then Autumn quietly took my hand, and asked me to come take a break with her, everyone on shift was standing around us giving me group hugs (cute!) and reassuring me that Heather Hess is in-fact a huge bitch. They all encouraged me to go take a break with Autumn L She led me upstairs (conveniently she lives in the apartment above Luna Park) and into her apt. there was a shiny bong, and she loaded me a bowl! What a girl! I calmed down, and the rest of the shift was a blast! It was so slow and we all planned a Party at P.J’s after work, my “Going away Party”. It was fun, I haven’t been terribly social like that in a long time, and it’s a good muscle to exercise from time to time. So here I am, at school (yes I missed first period math lab at 8am, but I needed the sleep) But I am here now!!

*whisper*I’m not sure who all reads this; I hope my mom isn’t reading it because I am compelled to write about something that has me a little (maybe more -that depends) irked. So someone asked if I would loan them $400 because they over-drafted buying $10 martinis and Chris Cornell concert tickets. They bought the tickets for both Seattle AND Portland, for themselves my brother and I. I don’t particularly want to go. This someone being a complete Chris Cornell Fanatic just doesn’t want to go alone. Needless to say that’s a lot of money to loan to someone, especially because I hardly even have that much money to my name, not to mention the idiocy and carelessness of over drafting on such overindulgences. */whisper*

SO anyways, Vanessa and I decided to skate it up on Saturday night after I got off work. We skated the Alki Strip 2 whole times! YOWZAH! My calves and hammies are sore, but not as sore as I thought, I did take a spill towards the end of our run, I was fairly fatigued and hit a pebble at just the right velocity to launch my off my long board. I could have easily pushed my leg out in front of me to catch my fall and recover, but I really wanted to lay down anyways, it seemed like a good idea at the time, but I’m left now with a bruised knee-cap! (A small price to pay). The weather allowing this hobby is dwindling now, and I won’t be able to do it much longer winter on its way. Vanessa and I talked about moving to Cali together when she graduates next year. We would be able to skate 365 days a year, not worry about torrential rains or frostbitten ears. We fantasized for a while, and I really want to do it. I want all my friends to come too! I want to get really good at surfing, and just be a full on beach bum. Why not?

Hooblah!

anyways.. I'm starving. and I should do some math and English like a good girl.

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grumble

So it's thursday already. I just got out of my Math lab, I took my diognostic test, and have to wait till tomarrow to get the results, I guessed a lot! I didn't think I wasn't going to be allowed to use a calculator :( Most of the stuff was there, at the tip of my brain, but I couldnt remember all those formulas I learned 3+ years ago. So no matter which module I place I'm pretty confident that I can learn (re learn) the formular pretty fast.
What makes all this a little easier is that I don't really have anything to distract me, other than one more season of veronica Mars, and mine and Bekah's book-love affair sleepovers. I do still have west 5, the weekend will be the last weekend I work at Luna Park. I just had enough and I need more time on my hands than that place was demanding of me. Well not even that Luna park even schedualed me that much.. it was just bad juju stressy poo poo.
Me journalism class got canceled. So I need to figure out another class that can possibly take it's place. SO I'll possibly come back adn post some more later.
I have alot of reading to do for my english online class, Instead of just listening in class to the discussions, I have to read them on a message board. ugh.
This is what I signed up for.

I am hungry.

Until later! CIAO

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